Saturday, May 17, 2008

Musings of a Medical Dinosaur

Musings of a Medical Dinosaur: " * First Law: The Art of Medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature takes its course.
* Second Law: It is impossible to make an asymptomatic patient feel better.
* Third Law: The urgency of the test is inversely proportional to the IQ of the insurance company preauthorization clerk.
* Fourth Law: There is no cure for stupid.
* Fifth Law: A patient's acceptance of a screening test is inversely proportional to its necessity for that particular patient.
* Sixth Law: Trauma survival is inversely related to the patient's value to society.
* Seventh Law: Fertility is inversely proportional to intelligence.
* Eighth Law: The better the surgeon, the more reluctant s/he is to operate.
* Ninth Law:
Part A: It has to be fun.
Part B: If it isn't fun, see Part A.
* Tenth Law: 'Simple' and 'Easy' are not necessarily the same.
* Eleventh Law: Poor planning on your part is not an emergency on my part.
* Twelfth Law: A bad idea held by many people for a long time is still a bad idea."

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