As an IVF doctor, I try to be non-directive in my counseling , and
help patients to make their own decisions for themselves. It's easy to be
judgmental and patriarchal , but we want our patients to feel that they have
the ability to make their own decisions , and we want to respect their
preferences.
Therefore, we explain all their choices to them , and tell
them that they should make a decision which feels right for them. After all, IVF treatment is elective, and patients have many options.
Sadly, this backfires, because lots of Indian patients
aren't very happy with this approach . They want a doctor who will decide for
them - after all, isn't the doctor the expert ? And aren't they paying his fat
fees for his advice ? Isn't it his job to tell them what to do ? What kind of
doctor asks a patient for their opinion ? Doesn't he know what the right
decision is ?
While it can be very tempting to decide on behalf of the
patient , this is not in the patient's long term best interests. If you blindly
agree with what the doctor tells you today , you may regret this afterwards.
You may wonder why you allowed the doctor to decide something which was so
critically important - and the problem is that doctors can't be mind readers,
and don't know what your personal preferences are .
Use a doctor as a valuable sounding board and as a trust source
of medical information , but please make the decision for yourself.
You can get a free second opinion by filling in the form at www.drmalpani.com/free-second-opinion so that I can guide you !
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