Most IVF patients are extremely optimistic that their IVF cycle is going to work for them. If every patient didn't think in their heart of hearts that the cycle was going to be successful, no one would ever have the courage to start one. After all, a failed cycle causes a lot of heartache and heartburn . Patients are putting a lot on the line when doing IVF - not just in terms of money, but also in the form of hope, time and energy .
They know that a lot rides on the outcome of the cycle , and because IVF gives them the best chance of having a baby , they're gather up all their courage and start off on a cycle. Of course, they're also very worried that the cycle may fail, and the ones who are realistic and well-read and have done their homework understand that the odds are stacked against them. After all, human reproduction is not efficient, and embryo implantation is a biological process which no doctor in the world can control.
Even after knowing that the chances of failure are more than the chances of success in a single cycle, the fact that they're still able to go ahead does mean that they need to be highly optimistic. And even if this optimism may seem to be irrational, it's often the only thing which allows them to start a cycle.
IVF is not an easy ride , and tests the emotional resilience and maturity of a patient. Lots of them are never be able to start another cycle when the first cycle fails because they had so much hope invested in the first one. That's why it's important to find the right degree of balance between optimism and realism when starting the treatment. Patients need to be prepared that it can take 3-4 cycles to have a baby, and these patients will have the courage to bounce back and give it another shot even if their cycle fails.
I agree this is not easy, and every patient needs to find what works best for them. Yes, it's important to hope for the best, but it's equally important to prepare for the worst , so you don't go to pieces in case the cycle fails. This is why it's important to step back and take a long-term perspective . Even though an individual cycle may fail, we still have the ability to learn a lot from that failed cycle, and can use this information to improve your odds of success for the next cycle.
It's important to think of IVF as a process which may take three or four cycles before it gives you the deeply-loved baby you want , rather than think of it as a single shot affair. Of course, in a perfect world , every IVF cycle would work, but then patients wouldn't need any counseling at all ! IVF technology has not brought us to that point as yet, so you need to be able to shield yourself from the possibility of heartbreak.