Why is your IVF doctor hiding information from you ?

 In an ideal world , every IVF doctor would treat the patient with respect , and make sure that they had realistic expectations of IVF treatment . At the time of the consultation, they would review the diagnosis with them , and prepare a treatment plan . They would explain what they were planning to do , how much time this would take, and what the costs and risks would be. This would ensure that patients are prepared for what was going to happen , because IVF treatment takes time, money and energy, and patients need to organise their finances, leaves and work commitments. That’s why it's important that they have realistic expectations as to how much time , energy and money they will have to invest in the process . IVF is elective treatment, and this is something which is very easy for every clinic to do .

The doctor should also explain why they've chosen a particular treatment plan , and what they will do to monitor the cycle to make sure everything is going well ; how they will be able to identity in case things don't go well ; what the checkpoints will be; and how they can correct for this, so patients know exactly what is going to happen and when . Patients hate unexpected surprises , and this openness and transparency is in the doctor's best interest , because it creates trust in the patient . Because the patient knows what is going to happen, they feel they are in control , rather than feeling helpless , lost and confused.

More importantly , when patients know what is planned, the chances for error go down dramatically , because patients become active participants in their treatment.

Sadly, most IVF clinics don’t bother to do any of this .

They modify treatment on the fly, and everything is very disorganised and unsystematic. They don’t share information with the patient, who often has no idea as to what is going on.

They don't provide a treatment plan , and it seems the treatment plan changes all the time, depending on who the doctor on duty happens to be . It often seems like the left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing , and the poor patient is clueless and lost. Are things going the way they were supposed to ? Is the response good ? or bad ?

They only find out there is a problem when the cycle fails, when the doctor reviews the records with the patient, and it comes up with all kinds of excuses , pretexts and reasons for why the cycle failed.

The poor patient feels cheated , and wants to know why this information wasn’t shared proactively, before the cycle was started. They want to know – Why are telling me this at the last minute ? – but don’t have the guts to express their displeasure.

 My advice is simple – learn to be proactive and assertive , because you are the one who will be spending a lot of money on your treatment. Ask for all this information upfront – this is your right, and you don’t need to be aggressive. The doctor is not doing you a favour by providing this - you have paid for his services  and have a right to know

If the doctor is rude, and refuses to answer your questions and treat you with respect , then you are definitely in the wrong IVF clinic .

You need to find a better doctor , who will treat you like a respected intelligent adult