IVF treatment cycles can swing either way- sometimes they work and sometimes they don’t. When they fail you need some time to recover- physically and mentally, or else you might find yourself averse to pursuing further treatment. But giving up can prove to be an expensive decision which you may regret later on in life.
The Options
Give yourself breathing space to recover - If a particular IVF cycle has failed, it is recommended that you take a break and then try again. This “interval” is your time to break free from the stress of the IVF treatment and give your body the time to recover. In this period of time, you may want to reassess your options, focus on healing and come to terms with all your feelings
Change the IVF clinic - This can be helpful, as you can get a fresh perspective. At any rate, getting a second opinion never hurts, and helps to confirm you are on the right track
Consider third party reproduction - This could include using donor eggs or donor embryos. This can be a challenging dilemma, and you need to listen to your heart - there are no right or wrong answers !
Surrogacy- If you've failed a number of cycles, you may want to contemplate the surrogacy option. Consult your IVF doctor about whether it is advisable to try IVF again and whether using a different method will be more beneficial. Check with him whether there is something you can do to step-up your chances of conception the next time around. If surrogacy is something you are open to, speak with your doctor about that option too
Counselling- This is one aspect you must strongly consider. Though consulting a psychologist is not something everyone is open to, counselling helps you voice your feelings and you get a sounding board and an independent objective viewpoint from an impartial advisor, which will help you put things in the right perspective.
Learning from the failure -
It is crucial that you discuss with your IVF doctor about what you can learn from the failed IVF cycle. The most common reason for failure is failed implantation. The commonest cause is that the development of the embryos which were transferred into the womb arrests. Often embryos which look perfect may have faulty chromosomes which prevent them from growing further.
Time to Stop?
Regardless of the number of times you have attempted IVF treatment, there may come a time when you have to take a decision about discontinuing it. This could be because:
• You do not feel emotionally strong enough to go through with it again, and are frustrated
• You are unable to financially afford the treatment
• Your IVF doctor may inform you that you have no chance of conceiving, and that the treatment is futile
• He may suggest third party options such as using donor eggs which you may not be comfortable with
The Alternatives
Discontinuing treatment can lead you to other choices:
• It might just help to consult a counsellor or speak with other women who have been in a situation like this. This will help you think more clearly and decide how best you can move on
• You may want to explore options such as adoption or fostering
• You may just want to delve into what life without children can be like
The important thing is to maintain positivity at all times. A negative outlook can only do harm- to your health as well as your psyche. At times, it’s this positivity that will get you through the toughest of situations in life and you may find that even though you've reached the end of your fertility journey, you have peace of mind that you tried your best, and can then move on with your life.
Want to explore your options after a failed IVF cycle ? Please contact me via this online form, so that I can guide you!
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