Most fertile couples are blissfully unaware of what infertile couples have to go through in order to have a baby. They are not aware of the suffering which infertility causes; and have no clue about the treatment options available for infertile couples.
They will often be flippant about infertility - and will often provide “advise” to infertile couples which can be heartbreaking. While they may not mean to be cruel, their insensitivity can cause a lot of pain and heartbreak.
Thus, many people advise infertile couples to just adopt a baby. They say stuff like – Isn’t this a much better and kinder thing to do , rather than take painful injections ? After all, what could be nobler than provided an unwanted baby with a loving home ? If I didn’t have children of my own, I would definitely have adopted a baby, rather than go to an IVF doctor !
Many people naively believe that the process of adoption is as easy as picking up a beggar child off the street and taking him home. They do not know what a complex process adoption can be – and how long the waiting lists are.
In reality, the number of children who are being put up for adoption is going down dramatically every year. This is because the number of unwanted children is on a sharp decline due advances in contraceptive treatment. Most women who find they have an unwanted pregnancy choose to safely terminate the pregnancy , rather than continue with it. The children we see begging on the streets are not up for adoption ! They are economic assets to their families , rather than being unwanted because they earn money for their families by begging, selling newspapers or used plastic bags. As a result the adoption agencies have a long waiting list of infertile couples.
The adoption decision involves intense soul searching by the couple , along with the whole hearted support of the relatives. If the couple chooses not to adopt , please respect their decision and appreciate that they have invested a lot of thought into this !
The good news is that even though adoption a baby has become increasingly difficult, it’s now possible for infertile couples to complete their family using the process of embryo adoption ! Not only is this much less expensive than traditional adoption, there’s no waiting list involved either. Even better, since the woman carries the pregnancy herself, she can experience the joy of
motherhood !
Confused as to whether IVF or adoption is the best choice for you ? Please send me your medical details by filling in the form at www.drmalpani.com/malpaniform.htm so that I can guide you better !
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